This Halloween I’m going as the scariest thing possible: A college-educated woman… who votes!
via GIPHY **(Actual footage of me slipping into election booth)**
Politicians have talked in hushed voices for months about the potential wrath of the College Educated Voting Woman. She is not tied to a political party. She makes up a huge demographic. And she remembers when you called her a slut.
Being a College Educated Woman is typically a normal, uneventful and somewhat depressing occupation… Here’s what’s in store: College Educated Woman is paid less for the same work than her male counterparts (Boo!). She is told what to do with her body by middle-age men in Congress (Double Boo!). AND she is told daily by perfect strangers to “Smile!” (HOLD ME BACK… I’M GONNA CRUSH SOME SKULLS).
But this is HALLOWEEN – and it’s also an Election year – so ya’ll know it’s about to get lit.
Halloween is always a little topsy turvy. It’s the one day a year where you can walk into a crowded restaurant with a butchers knife coming out of your head and people don’t panic. No, they applaud your use of blood and contusion contouring. It’s a weird day.
So on this crazy day, it’s only right that the typical, normal, sad College Educated Woman is not what she seems the other 364 days out of the year. She is a damn terror.
RISE UP DEMON WOMEN… YOU HAVE WORK TO DO!!!
(Cue Witch’s cackle)
Tomorrow, on All Hallows Eve, I invite the spooky, mysterious and devilish College Educated Women to creep out of their coffins and stuffy offices (where they had to endure another request to make coffee… “Because you are so good at it!”)
Remember that Wage Gap ladies.
Remember those conversations about what you can and cannot do with your body.
Remember when those men talked over you.
Remember when those men talked about issues that effect you and you had no seat at the table.
And now show up to the polls and raise holy hell.